


Take From Me

by sunshinesung



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst, Anxiety Disorder, Dysfunctional Family, Eventual Relationships, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, Family Issues, Fluff, Kleptomania, M/M, Romance, Shoplifting, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-16
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-03-18 19:55:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29495412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunshinesung/pseuds/sunshinesung
Summary: Haechan began stealing things at a very young age. Now, his fingers only burned around a certain person. A certain person who Haechan considered his one and only best friend—Mark Lee.Haechan was lucky Mark just so happened to think he looked really good in his clothes.
Relationships: Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee
Comments: 14
Kudos: 109





	1. Chapter 1: Preview

Haechan wasn’t really sure when it started or why it started. Maybe it was for attention, but he always went unnoticed. Maybe it was a game, because Haechan never wanted to get caught. Either way, the days blended together from before and after. He always wanted to stop, but he never made an effort.

Haechan started stealing little things from his mother when he was very young. If she would take his toys away because he was being a brat, he would take a shoe or a shirt and hide it in his closet. A means of retaliation at first branched into a sort of hobby.

He began stealing things from gas stations when he was just a little bit older. Ten years old maybe. The idea that he would get caught didn’t hold him back for long. If anything, the idea of getting caught pushed his curiosity further. Haechan would see something small and his hands would burn.

The first few times, Haechan felt almost instantaneous guilt. He couldn’t find it in himself to regret it, he wasn’t planning on returning it, but he still felt something was wrong. What if they saw him? What if they knew and just let it go? What if they remembered him and caught him next time?

And then all of those feelings went away. And Haechan did it again. He took and took. Only small things, things he didn’t even need, but had to take. 

A chapstick from the convenience store-  
A pair of gloves from the mall-  
A soda from the grocery store-  
A bottle of black nail polish from the drug store-

More often than not, he wouldn’t think twice about the items he stole after they had made it back safely to his house. He would toss them in his drawer or in the closet and forget until he opened it again with a new item.

Haechan was eighteen now and lost interest in stealing from stores. At least, less of an interest. He still occasionally slipped an item into his pocket here and there, but not nearly as often. 

Now, his fingers only burned around a certain person. A certain person who Haechan considered his one and only best friend.

Sure, Haechan had plenty of friends and never felt left out at school; but, Mark was the only person who was really there for him. Who understood him and his family and his whole life. Who made him feel like everything was okay and his family situation was okay (It wasn’t).

Mark was also the only person who knew about Haechan’s stealing habit. 

Haechan was still under the impression nobody knew, but Mark was fully aware. Mark had never mentioned it or told him to put something down, but the first time he saw it happen he was very confused.

Mark knew Haechan had more than enough money to buy whatever it was he wanted to steal. Mark knew Haechan’s family was well off, so he didn’t really understand. But he didn’t say anything.

Mark didn’t say anything when they left a store and Haechan offered him a drink he just saw him slip into his pocket when they were inside. Mark didn’t say anything when they were back in Haechan’s room and he would toss something into his drawer.

Mark didn’t say anything when he found his own hoodie hidden inside Haechan’s closet.

So yeah, maybe Mark shouldn’t have snooped around Haechan’s drawer and closet when he knew the other was in the bathroom, but he had to see. He just really didn’t expect to find his own stuff there. As far as Mark was concerned, Haechan only stole from stores, not his friends.

Mark did see the patterns though. This was something even Haechan wasn’t aware of, but Mark just understood Haechan.

On days Haechan was especially quiet or stand-offish, he would steal something. Mark could probably attribute this to Haechan’s family situation, but he didn’t want to pry. Mark knew Haechan thought he was in the clear, so he didn’t want to bring it all up at once.

On days Haechan’s anxiety was worse or school was getting hard, he would steal something. Haechan never stole from the store more than once a month, but he had a breaking point. Mark just couldn’t understand why he would choose to cope this way.

On days Haechan would finally open up and tell Mark that his mother was drinking again or ignoring him, he would notice something of his missing. This was more rare, but Mark always noticed it.

One day, when Mark went over to Haechan’s house, he noticed something in Haechan’s eyes. They were both sitting on the bed and Haechan had been staring at the bracelet on Mark’s wrist.

Mark stood up and Haechan broke his gaze away to the floor.

“Do you mind if I borrow a hoodie,” Mark asked, standing in front of the closet, “It’s kind of cold in here.”

Mark glanced behind himself to watch Haechan squirm with nerves. He picked at the skin around his nails but nodded his head anyways. “Yeah sure, just... yeah, no, that’s fine,” Haechan replied hesitantly. 

Mark starred for a little bit longer, but Haechan refused to meet his eyes. The air in the room felt thick with guilt. Like Haechan knew he was in for trouble. But he didn’t try to stop Mark.

Mark didn’t understand.

He opened Haechan’s closet and pretended to look around for a hoodie. He pulled his own hoodie out and looked it over for a second. All an act for Haechan.

“Did I leave this here?” Mark asked, feigning innocence. He had to know Haechan’s response.

Haechan didn’t even look up. Like he knew exactly what Mark was holding up at him. He just starred and starred at his nail beds, as if they were the most interesting thing on the earth. “I don’t know probably—“

“Haechan.” Mark cut him off.

Haechan finally looked up. 

Mark tossed the hoodie onto the bed and sat down next to Haechan. “You know I didn’t leave this here,” he explained softly. 

Haechan’s eyes met Mark’s and then quickly looked away. Suddenly, Haechan’s eyes were welling up. “I didn’t—... Mark, I’m sorry, really, I swear I can explain, I just—,” Haechan suddenly looked down to where Mark had placed his hand over his own. 

“I don’t care, Haechan,” Mark mumbled. “Really, I didn’t need it anyways. You can have it if you want it,” he explained. Haechan gave him a blank confused stare. “Just tell me next time,” Mark offered.

Haechan nodded his head slowly, trying to process everything. Mark thought he almost looked disappointed. In himself? In Mark? He wasn’t sure, but he just wanted to help. He took his hand off of Haechan. 

That night, when Mark was walking home, he checked for the bracelet on his wrist. Not really to his surprise, it wasn’t there anymore. It was concerning how good Haechan was at stealing.

For the next months, Mark hadn’t noticed Haechan stealing anything from any stores. He even checked the drawer a few times when Haechan stepped out. Nothing was stolen.

It surprised Mark at first, but then he started seeing it. The keychain from his backpack was in there. An old shirt he forgot about was in the closet. Little items of his scattered around hidden places. 

So, maybe Haechan wasn’t stealing from stores anymore. But he was still taking things from Mark. Maybe they had made progress, but Mark still knew there was a long way to go.

Haechan was lucky Mark just so happened to think he looked really good in his clothes.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As soon as Mark and Haechan walked into the mall department store, Mark could feel eyes on him. No, on Haechan.
> 
> The store clerk was definitely keeping a close eye on Haechan.
> 
> And then Mark saw it. He saw Haechan slip a necklace into his pocket. He saw that the clerk saw. Mark felt sick suddenly.

Haechan really started to believe he was in the clear with Mark. He was genuinely under the impression that Mark just thought he was stealing from him, and he didn’t know about the stores or malls. Of course, it was obvious that Mark knew, but Haechan was so far in denial he couldn’t see it.

Haechan didn’t want to stop. He couldn’t for some reason. For a while, he was at least careful not to do it around Mark. But then, he started to notice that his fingers would itch to steal even more when he was around. Haechan didn’t know why, but he didn’t give himself the chance to think about it too much.

Mark didn’t notice Haechan stealing from stores for a while, and he really thought he got through to him. He should’ve known better though. Whatever Haechan was doing, Mark could tell he had been doing it for a really long time. He should’ve known how hard of a habit it would be to break.

Apparently, stealing from Mark wasn’t enough anymore.

Haechan started grabbing little items from stores again. It started with a mechanical pencil. One of the nice ones with point five led. He never used it once.

Then, he stole a melon flavored drink from the gas station him and Mark were at. Mark’s favorite.

When Haechan gave it to Mark and Mark didn’t ask any questions, he considered himself clear as day. There was no way Mark knew.

Except, of course Mark knew, and he ended up saving Haechan’s ass one day.

As soon as Mark and Haechan walked into the mall department store, Mark could feel eyes on him. No, on Haechan.

The store clerk was definitely keeping a close eye on Haechan.

And then Mark saw it. He saw Haechan slip a necklace into his pocket. He saw that the clerk saw. Mark felt sick suddenly.

He quickly grabbed something. It was a shirt, just a normal white t-shirt. “Haechan, I’m going to buy this,” he blurted out.

Haechan gave him a confused look, but nodded his head anyways. When Haechan didn’t make a move to follow, Mark grabbed his hand and led him towards the checkout desk. 

Mark could tell Haechan had no idea what was happening, but the store clerk looked like he had captured prey. 

“Will that be all?” the clerk asked.

Mark quickly acted like he remembered something. “Oh, where’s that necklace I wanted? I told you to hold it,” he spoke to Haechan, holding a serious gaze.

Haechan returned his gaze, but he was still very confused. As soon as Haechan opened his mouth, Mark cut him off before he could say the wrong thing.

“Didn’t you put it in your pocket?” Mark asked, pleading with his eyes.

Haechan didn’t say anything. Instead, he slowly took the necklace out of his pocket and set it on the desk.

To Mark’s surprise, the store clerk looked angry. Angry that he couldn’t send Haechan to jail? Mark wasn’t sure, but he was visibly deflated.

As soon as Mark had bought the items, he dragged Haechan out by the hand. Haechan’s hand was surprisingly warm, but Mark tried to ignore it.

Haechan gave Mark a look like he was crazy. Mark didn’t give him the chance to speak.

“Haechan, don’t ever go back to that store,” he explained, deadpan. Haechan just shook his head in disbelief, still one step behind Mark. 

“I know you were going to steal that necklace in there Haechan. We both saw it. Me and that guy working there. Please, just don’t go back there.”

“So you aren’t mad at me?” Haechan asked, crossing his arms over his chest like a pouty child.

Mark’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. He shook his head, trying to understand where this was coming from. “What- no, Haechan... I’m seriously worried about you. If you were caught-“

“Then would you be mad at me?” Haechan interrupted. 

Mark knew something was wrong, but he couldn’t put a finger on it. He knew he had to tread lightly, something was clearly wrong with Haechan, but he didn’t even know how to approach it.

“No, I wouldn’t be mad at you Haechan. I would just be scared. I’m scared now. You have no idea how worried I am, something’s wrong Haechan,” Mark explained slowly.

Haechan looked down at the floor. And then up at Mark. And then back down at the floor, hesitant. “Can we go home?” Haechan asked quietly. He sounded defeated. Mark just nodded his head and led the way. 

Mark missed the feeling of Haechan’s hand in his.

Once they were back in Mark’s car, Haechan broke down. There were no tears or screaming, but Mark could tell. The atmosphere was so tense Mark swore he could reach out and feel it.

“Please try to help me understand, Haechan,” Mark begged, looking over at his honey haired friend.

Haechan took a deep breath. One that was shaky yet stabilizing. “I don’t think my mom has even raised her voice at me once since my dad left,” he started, trying to really word his thoughts.

Haechan hadn’t even given it much thought himself. He never tried to understand why he wanted to steal so badly, but Mark was making him think. Making him realize things about himself he didn’t even know.

Mark understood immediately. He didn’t need Haechan to say another word, but he stayed silent anyways. He wasn’t going to ruin this moment.

Haechan continued after a moment. “It’s like she doesn’t care what I do. It hurts... it really hurts Mark,” he willed the tears away in his eyes, but they didn’t go unnoticed.

Mark pulled Haechan into an awkward hug. Awkward because of the angle and space between them, but Haechan liked it anyways. He needed a hug amongst many other things. All of the things his mother never gave him anymore.

“I know it’s hard, but you can’t let this go any further. I don’t want you to end up on that path in life. You deserve so much better...” Mark trailed off when he sensed he said too much. Sure, all of this was true, but he probably could’ve held some of it in.

Mark just cared about Haechan too damn much.

“Okay, okay, I get it Mark. I’ll try, I promise. I don’t even know why I do it. I guess you know by now that this isn’t my first time stealing,” Haechan pulled away from the hug, messing with the strings of his hoodie instead. “I just thought maybe if they caught me she’d really pay attention.”

Mark let a thought float around in his mind. A dangerous, selfish one. One that could risk the entire safety of the moment they created. And then he said it out loud.

“So why do you steal from me?”

Haechan stared, wide eyed. He hadn’t thought about that either. It was obvious his mother wasn’t a factor in that, but he didn’t know what was. He blushed anyways.

“I guess... I don’t know. I just can’t... I get this feeling,” Haechan tried to explain, holding his hands out, palms up. 

Mark was holding onto his every word, trying to make something out of the mostly incomprehensible sentences. His eyes flickered between Haechan’s eyes and his palms.

“Whenever I want to... need to steal something, I think I feel it in my hands. Like, something is pulling my hands towards the object,” Haechan put his hands back down quickly and blushed even deeper. “God, that’s stupid, never mind.”

Mark interjected before Haechan could beat himself up too much. “No, no, I get it. Well, I mean, I don’t, but I think I can understand what you’re getting at. Like an urge you can’t resist?”

Haechan nodded his head. “Yeah, an urge. And... I think I feel it the most around you.”

Mark tried to process this information all at once. He tried, really, but it was like his brain shut down. Absolutely could not function. His heart was beating like crazy. 

Stealing. Mark had to remind himself this was about stealing—a crime—not anything further than that. 

Mark’s eyes landed on Haechan’s hands. He was messing with his fingers again, picking at the nail beds. 

“Are you feeling it right now?” Mark dared to ask.

Haechan nodded his head again. “I’m sorry, Mark. I don’t know what to do.”

Mark continued to stare at Haechan’s hands. “You feel it... in your hands?”

Haechan nodded a little more frantically. He felt anxious, like the car was spinning and he was losing control. He couldn’t stop thinking about his mother and the store clerk. 

Suddenly, Haechan felt a pressure in his hand. It was Mark’s hand holding his own. He let out a small gasp in surprise.

Haechan looked up at Mark who was beat red and looking out the window. Haechan couldn’t help but smile a little.

“Does this help?” Mark asked, feeling absolutely stupid.

Haechan felt calm. He wasn’t thinking about stealing, or his mother, or the store clerk. He was thinking about how nice the weight of Mark’s hand felt in his own. Like a puzzle piece.

“Yeah... I think it does.” Haechan replied.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> leave a comment if you liked it 🥺 it makes my day <33


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Do you feel it?” Haechan suddenly asked.
> 
> Mark looked up at him, confused. “Feel what?”
> 
> “The urge. You know, the one we talked about,” Haechan stated as if it was obvious.

Haechan and Mark didn’t really talk about it much after that. The hand holding or the stealing. But whenever Mark would notice Haechan was feeling especially anxious or dejected, he would offer his hand. An unspoken agreement fell upon them.

Mark wanted to talk about it, had thought about it many times, but he didn’t want to make Haechan uncomfortable. Whatever was going on with Haechan greatly outweighed Mark’s feelings. And he could accept that.

That didn’t stop Mark from thinking about it every night until he lost sleep though.

Mark knew he liked holding Haechan’s hand, he really really did, but he also wanted to know why he liked it so much. He wanted to know why he liked when Haechan wore his clothes, why he liked the way Haechan looked when he was shy. All of him. 

The answer was obvious enough, but Mark was kind of stupid. So, maybe Mark liked Haechan. But that was something he was willing to just push aside until the right time.

Sure, he had a crush on Haechan. Everyone had a crush at some point in their life, so why would this be any different? Mark didn’t care. This was fine. Everything was fine. 

It was not.

Every time Mark was around Haechan he was thinking about it. This so-called crush he had. What would Haechan think if he knew? What would happen if he found out? Would Haechan feel the same way? Would he freak out and never talk to Mark again?

Okay, even Mark knew the last one was pretty unlikely, but there was always a chance. It didn’t really matter though, because Mark didn’t plan on doing anything about it.

“Mark?”

Haechan’s voice instantly pulled Mark out of his thoughts. He looked up at Haechan from where he had been sitting on the floor and playing with the strings of his sweatpants. 

Haechan shifted on the bed, leaning over so he could look at Mark better. 

“You’ve been... distant, lately,” Haechan confessed.

Mark stayed silent for a moment before offering a smile. “Sorry, I’ve just been thinking a lot.”

“About what?”

“Just the same stuff, don’t worry about it-“

“Something is definitely bothering you, don’t give me that. I’m your best friend, you know you can tell me anything.”

Mark’s smile deflated at that. Best friends. That’s all they were. Mark shook his head quickly to snap himself out of those thoughts. Why did it matter?

“Really, you don’t have to worry.” Mark picked up his phone from his lap, pretending like scrolling through instagram was way more important than wherever this conversation was going.

Haechan tried again anyways. “Well I am worried. Can’t I feel worried about you too?” he questioned, pausing for a moment, “I want you to be able to talk to me about your problems too. You never tell me anything- Hey!”

Haechan reached down and knocked Mark’s phone out of his hand when he noticed Mark was blatantly ignoring him. 

Mark looked up at Haechan, but he regretted it immediately. Haechan was still leaning over the edge of the bed, propping himself up with one arm. Mark had been sitting up against the edge of the bed and was now directly under him from this angle. 

Their faces were inches apart.

Mark stood up in a panic, fast enough to get some distance between him and Haechan, but also sudden enough to hit Haechan’s chin with his head.

Haechan flinched hard, reaching a hand up to cup his chin. “What the hell—“

Mark covered his mouth with his hand. His long string of apologies came out muffled. “Oh my god, I didn’t mean to— I swear I—... Haechan, I’m so sorry!”

Haechan brought his hand back from his face. There was just a little bit of blood on his hand. Probably a small cut on his chin, but he didn’t really care. Mark was acting way too weird.

In a second, Mark was in front of Haechan again. Blinded by guilt, he reached his own hand up to cup Haechan’s chin, tilting his head up to get a better look at the tiny little wound. 

“Just, uh,” Mark looked around the room, “stay here, I think you have some bandaids in your bathroom.”

Haechan stared at him instead. Ignoring the insignificant amount of pain in his jaw. “It doesn’t hurt, just talk to me—,”

Mark left for the bathroom. His panicked state didn’t retain anything Haechan was saying. His body was still moving way faster than his mind.

He came back with a small bandage and some hydrogen peroxide to clean the cut. It wasn’t even that bad of a cut, he probably didn’t even need a bandaid after he washed it off, but Mark was panicking.

“Are you even listening to me?” Haechan asked. He knew the answer, but he actually found the moment a little too funny not to say anything. Mark never failed to surprise him with his stupidity.

Mark poured a little bit of the peroxide onto a cotton ball he grabbed. He sat down next to Haechan, gently starting to dab at the cut. 

Haechan hissed and grabbed Mark’s wrist, trying to pull his hand away. 

Mark looked up, meeting Haechan’s eyes. He dropped his hand down by his side, feeling trapped. There was really no way he was getting out of this.

Mark thought of his options. He could always lie, make up something on the spot? That didn’t really appeal to Mark though. The whole lying to his best friend thing. Then there was always the alternative option. He could tell the truth.

Mark found himself lost in Haechan’s eyes for a moment. Then Haechan smiled and it just made everything worse. 

Haechan threw his legs over Mark’s lap so he could face him better on the bed. He just wanted to understand what was wrong with him. He felt like he always told Mark everything, but Mark just kept it all to himself. Haechan wanted to be there for Mark too.

Haechan had no idea he was the root of Mark’s problems.

“Just tell me Mark,” he started, pleading with his eyes, “whatever it is, I just want to help you.”

Mark looked down at Haechan’s legs. At the bare skin of his thighs exposed by his shorts. Haechan always had a habit of wearing shorts that were just way too short for Mark’s sanity.

Mark stared and stared, trying to think of the right words to say. Haechan wasn’t taking no for an answer at this point. He felt like his skin was on fire.

“Do you feel it?” Haechan suddenly asked.

Mark looked up at him, confused. “Feel what?”

“The urge. You know, the one we talked about,” Haechan stated as if it was obvious.

Mark wasn’t quite catching on. “You mean, to steal?” he asked, trying to control the confused inflection to his voice. He didn’t want to make Haechan feel bad about his habit, but he had never personally felt the urge to steal.

Haechan shook his head, thinking for a moment. “Just... to touch,” he explained, looking down at the space between them “Like you’re drawn towards it.” At his legs in Mark’s lap and Mark’s hand hovering awkwardly to the side.

Mark blushed furiously and looked to the side. “There’s nothing here I want to take,” Mark responded lamely, trying not to think too much of the implications. What was Haechan even getting at?

Haechan shifted on the bed, closer to Mark. “I don’t know how to explain it, but you know what I mean. Sometimes I just need to be closer to things. Like I want to reach out and hold it,” he said, looking cautiously up at Mark.

Mark swallowed around nothing nervously. He subconsciously leaned closer to Haechan, just out of comfort and routine. He wasn’t even sure what he was supposed to do.

“You can, y’know. If you want,” Haechan finally said.

But Mark was shy, and needed a little more convincing. “What can I do?” he asked, struggling to make any move. He felt so little even if Haechan was smaller than him. He clenched the sheets at his side.

“You can touch me,” Haechan stated.

Mark blinked once. Then twice. Then he placed his hand lightly on Haechan’s thigh. The skin was warm and inviting, but his heart was racing faster than ever. He looked at Haechan, waiting for any response. For him to push him away or yell.

Except, none of this happened. Instead, Haechan placed his hand over Mark’s on top of his thigh. He smiled.

Mark bit his bottom lip, trying to understand the situation better.

“Relax, Mark. It’s fine,” Haechan spoke softly, trying to make Mark feel comfortable. “It feels better, right? Like when you held my hand.”

Mark nodded his head, but he was pretty sure they weren’t on the same page. No. Haechan was definitely on a completely different planet. Mark wanted to touch Haechan because he liked him, not because it calmed him down.

Haechan placed a hand on Mark’s back. Mark pulled Haechan into a hug in a spurt of courage. He held Haechan close and tight, like he could disappear any second.

Haechan yelped in surprise, but welcomed it anyways. His hands rested on Mark’s lower back. Then he slipped his hands up under Mark’s sweatshirt. He felt the warmth of his back through his fingers. His own face was flushed and warm as well.

Mark flinched at the contact. Haechan’s hands were so cold but they weren’t unwelcome. Mark’s hand on Haechan’s thigh gripped a little tighter. A grounding pressure. He lifted his other hand up to the nape of Haechan’s neck. He brushed his fingers through the grown out hair. 

“Do you feel better?” Haechan asked, similar to the way Mark asked not too long ago.

“Yeah, I do,” Mark responded. He didn’t know what this meant to Haechan, but it meant a lot to Mark. He felt like he was exploding on the inside, but he also felt incredibly grounded.

Haechan rubbed his hand up and down Mark’s back soothingly. “Whatever was bothering you, I hope you feel comfortable enough to tell me soon. I’m here for you.”

Mark just nodded his head, still hooked in Haechan’s neck. He giggled a little, unable to control himself. If only he could just tell Haechan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you enjoyed hehe <33


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mark shook his head once again before he spoke. “Well, I don’t think you will ever understand.”
> 
> “Make me understand,” Haechan whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short chapter sorrryyy there will probably be a new one VERY soon

A few weeks later, Mark sees Haechan at the grocery store.

Now, Mark already knew Haechan was plenty popular. Not everybody knew him, but he had a lot of friends. A lot more than Mark had himself, who was pretty content with Haechan and a few others. A close circle.

Haechan’s circle was a lot wider. This never bothered Mark. Of course, Mark never really thought of Haechan with other people until he recently discovered his own crush, but it still hadn’t proved to be any problem. Who was Mark to dictate anything in Haechan’s life?

That didn’t stop him from feeling jealous though.

Jealousy was a new and foreign feeling to Mark. He experienced it before, but not for another person he felt romantic feelings for. Not for Haechan.

Mark couldn’t help himself though. Not staring at Haechan now, holding his friend's hand at the grocery store of all places.

Mark suddenly remembered when he held Haechan’s hand to comfort him. Of course it wouldn’t mean anything to Haechan, but it still hurt.

Haechan was with his close friend Jeno. Jeno, who was all smiles and certainly way too adorable. He was a year younger than Haechan and Mark, but it created no divide in their friendship. They were really good friends, and Mark knew this.

But then he started thinking. What if they were more than friends? This was highly unlikely considering Haechan was very affectionate. Mark knew deep down it probably meant nothing, just like when Haechan holds Mark’s hand.

No amount of reasoning stopped the burning in his gut.

After that incident, which Mark is sure Haechan wasn’t even aware of, he became a little more closed off towards Haechan.

Haechan noticed it of course, but he thought it just had to do with whatever was bothering Mark a while ago. 

Haechan knew Mark was never very affectionate and had to gradually open up to him, so it was only fair for Mark to regress when he felt less comfortable.

Haechan confronted him about it anyways.

Haechan had just tried and failed for the second time that day to hold Mark’s hand. Haechan wasn’t necessarily feeling the urge to steal at the moment, he just wanted to be closer to Mark. But he wasn’t getting anywhere.

He could respect boundaries, but Mark had been the one to hold his hand in the first place. Why did he keep brushing him off?

“Mark, is everything okay?” he asked nervously.

Mark looked up from his phone, wide-eyed. He smiled almost instantly, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “‘Course. Why wouldn’t it be?”

Haechan shrugged his shoulders, looking down at Mark’s hands. He jutted his bottom lip out in a pout. “Well, for starters you’ve been really quiet lately. And you keep pushing me away.”

“I’m not pushing you away,” Mark insisted.

Haechan’s frown deepened. “When you repeatedly brush me off when I’m just trying to hold your hand, it kind of feels like I’m being pushed away,” he offered back honestly.

Mark tried not to ponder on it for too long, but what did Haechan mean by ‘just’ holding hands? He thought it must really mean nothing to Haechan.

Mark’s tone grew a little harsher. “Well I’m sorry I don’t want to hold your hand all the time?” he said, like a question. “You know I don’t like that stuff. Don’t you have Jeno or Johnny for that?” 

Haechan’s face contorted in confusion. Then he let himself calm down, trying to think before he could speak. He didn’t want to bring other people into this, and he didn’t even know why Mark was trying to. 

Haechan took a deep breath before he spoke. “So you’re saying that you don’t want me near you? That you didn’t want to touch me all over last time-“

“God, Haechan, don’t fucking say it like that-“

“Well am I wrong?”

They kept cutting each other off, not wanting to hear each other’s side. Mark was embarrassed and Haechan was having absolutely none of his bullshit.

When Mark didn’t speak, Haechan did. “What is this about?” he asked, “seriously. What is going on with you lately?”

Mark lightly shook his head. Then shrugged his shoulders. He looked kind of like a kicked puppy. “I don’t know...”

Haechan sighed and rolled his eyes. “You aren’t making any sense to me and I just want to understand.”

To Haechan’s surprise, Mark actually laughed at that. A light chuckle, almost sad.

Mark shook his head once again before he spoke. “Well, I don’t think you will ever understand.”

Mark was sure he knew how Haechan felt by now. All of the signs told him, in his mind, that Haechan didn’t feel the same way.

“Try me,” Haechan challenged with a smirk. He crossed his arms over his chest and stared at Mark straight on from across the living room couch. 

Mark was overcome by emotions and couldn’t think rationally. He crawled over slowly to Haechan’s side of the couch until he was in front of him.

Haechan’s smirk left his face instantly.

Mark took Haechan’s arms and uncrossed them. He held them by his sides and leaned over him.

From Mark’s position, he could see Haechan swallow his nerves. The angle allowed him to see how long Haechan’s eyelashes were and how well the cut on his chin had healed.

Mark lifted one hand to cup Haechan’s face, the other arm still holding him up. He waited for Haechan to push him away once again.

“Make me understand,” Haechan whispered.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Does that mean I can still steal your hoodies?” Haechan asked out of pure curiosity for Mark’s response. 
> 
> “You can take whatever you want from me,” Mark whispered in response.

“Why were you holding hands with Jeno at the store?” Mark asked.

Haechan let out a sigh, brushing his hand through the hairs on the back of Mark’s neck. “Is that what started all of this?” he teased, leaning in to kiss down Mark’s jaw. He nipped at the skin of his neck. 

Mark pouted again. “Why can’t you just answer my question?” Mark questioned. They had been making out like this on the couch for the past five minutes, but hadn’t gotten anywhere.

Haechan licked a stripe up Mark’s neck. Haechan could feel the goosebumps rising from where his hand was still placed on Mark’s nape. It made him smirk a little more.

Mark pulled away from Haechan. He placed a hand on the arm of the couch to hold himself up. “Talk to me Haechan,” he pleaded.

Haechan pulled Mark back down by his hair. He gipped his hair tighter between his fingers until Mark hissed. Haechan took the opportunity to attach their mouths again.

Haechan was very dominant. He kissed like he was starving and held Mark like he was going to run away.

Mark, who had only kissed a few other people before—both of which being very shy girls—was a little intimidated. He tried his best to keep up with Haechan, but he just couldn’t find a pace. Not when his mind was racing.

Mark smiled into the next kiss, and the next. He couldn’t believe Haechan was even kissing him, but he still wanted to talk to him. Sure, this was a pretty good sign to Mark, but he still needed better verbal affirmation. 

When Haechan lifted his leg slightly to brush his thigh against Mark’s crotch, Mark pulled away completely. He was still blushing and his lips were red and slick with spit. It was a little gross, but Mark didn’t really care. If anything, he wanted more of it.

Haechan whined, motioning for Mark to come back. Mark stood his ground though and stayed sat on the couch. He kept some distance between them just in case Haechan tried anything again. 

Haechan knew he wasn’t getting what he wanted this time, and he couldn’t complain. Mark was right, they should talk. But he’d rather Mark did a lot of other things with that mouth right now.

“Look, holding hands with Jeno meant nothing if that’s what you’re really asking. I just wanted to see if it felt that same as when I held hands with you...” Haechan looked down at the space between them, suddenly feeling why. After everything, Mark thought it was shocking Haechan could still feel flustered. 

“Well?” Mark asked quietly, trying to gouge everything Haechan was feeling. It was pretty obvious at this point, but he still wanted to hear it.

Haechan chuckled. “God, you are pathetic,” he said between quite unattractive snorts of laughter. “I’m not into Jeno you big puppy. Does that make you happy now? I’m into you, Mark. Not Jeno, not anybody else. Just you.”

Mark smiled like a dumb little kid. “Just me?” he asked, reassuring himself slowly but surely. Haechan nodded in response. Mark bit his bottom lip to contain his excitement.

Mark crawled back over Haechan and attached their lips again. This time, Mark was able to match Haechan’s energy a little bit better. He wasn’t thinking as much and just enjoying the moment.

“Just you, too, Haechan,” Mark spoke softly against his lips. Haechan hit him in the chest with a closed fist, as if to say ‘don’t be so cheesy.’

“Does that mean I can still steal your hoodies?” Haechan asked out of pure curiosity for Mark’s response. 

Mark slipped his free hand up and under the hoodie Haechan had on (which did belong to Mark). His hands were warm and made Haechan feel butterflies instantly.

“You can take whatever you want from me,” Mark whispered in response.

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave comments if you liked this! If this fic gets any response I’ll continue, but for now this is just a (sort of) preview! Thanks for reading <33


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